Further Thoughts on George Bush, Motherfucker-in-Chief

Lookit the dumb motherfucker

I was thinking about what George Bush, motherfucker that he is, did yesterday. You know, the whole commuting "Scooter" Libby's sentence thing. Check out his statement:

I respect the jury's verdict. But I have concluded that the prison sentence given to Mr. Libby is excessive. Therefore, I am commuting the portion of Mr. Libby's sentence that required him to spend 30 months in prison.

My decision to commute his prison sentence leaves in place a harsh punishment for Mr. Libby. The reputation he gained through his years of public service and professional work in the legal community is forever damaged. His wife and young children have also suffered immensely. He will remain on probation. The significant fines imposed by the judge will remain in effect. The consequences of his felony conviction on his former life as a lawyer, public servant and private citizen will be long-lasting.

Think about the rampant motherfuckery in that statement. When George W. Bush was governor of Texas, 152 death penalty cases came before him. He sent 152 people to the great beyond. He didn't even give those cases cursory review. But 30 months for fellow motherfucker "Scooter" Libby is "excessive"? What a motherfucker. And an asshole.

How much of an asshole is George W. Bush? Look here to find out.

George Bush Is a Motherfucker

He's a dumb motherfucker, at that.

Seriously. If you hear that Bush is visiting your town, put your mom on a plane out of there post haste. If she's in town when he arrives, George Bush will surely fuck your mother. Why? Because that's what motherfuckers do. That, and commute the sentences of certain assholes, thereby allowing them to retain Fifth Amendment clamming-up rights. Rather than a pardon, this commutation means that Libby (who is himself a motherfucker) can still appeal his sentence. Thus, he can still keep his piehole shut when questioned. In case you forgot, Libby was the chief of staff for world-class motherfucker Dick Cheney. He recently received a thirty month prison sentence for his four felony convictions (returned by the jury in March).

Samuel Johnson once said that "Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous and dreadful."

I wonder what Sammy J would make of George Bush, who is a motherfucker devoid of both integrity and knowledge.

For What It's Worth

I don't think the answer is quite this simple.

Take a look at this.

Click image for a larger version.

Wow. Bush hasn't had a 50% or greater approval rating (whatever the hell that really means) since the end of 2005. And that was clearly an outlier.

Im in ur crowdz, stealin ur watchez



Check this out. Around fifty seconds in, look at Bush's left arm as he's greeting the Albanian crowd. What's not on it fifteen seconds later?

Oh noez!

As the Iraqis Stand Up...

Cluster bomb.


Cluster fuck.

George Bush, June 2005:

"Our strategy can be summed up this way: As the Iraqis stand up, we will stand down."

Things today are somewhat different:

WASHINGTON - Military planners have abandoned the idea that standing up Iraqi troops will enable American soldiers to start coming home soon and now believe that U.S. troops will have to defeat the insurgents and secure control of troubled provinces.

Training Iraqi troops, which had been the cornerstone of the Bush administration's Iraq policy since 2005, has dropped in priority, officials in Baghdad and Washington said.

No change has been announced, and a Pentagon spokesman, Col. Gary Keck, said training Iraqis remains important. "We are just adding another leg to our mission," Keck said, referring to the greater U.S. role in establishing security that new troops arriving in Iraq will undertake.

But evidence has been building for months that training Iraqi troops is no longer the focus of U.S. policy. Pentagon officials said they know of no new training resources that have been included in U.S. plans to dispatch 28,000 additional troops to Iraq. The officials spoke only on the condition of anonymity because they aren't authorized to discuss the policy shift publicly. Defense Secretary Robert Gates made no public mention of training Iraqi troops on Thursday during a visit to Iraq.

In a reflection of the need for more U.S. troops, the Pentagon decided earlier this month to increase the length of U.S. Army tours in Iraq from 12 to 15 months. The extension came amid speculation that the U.S. commander there, Army Gen. David Petraeus, will ask that the troop increase be maintained well into 2008.

U.S. officials don't say that the training formula - championed by Gen. John Abizaid when he was the commander of U.S. forces in the Middle East and by Gen. George Casey when he was the top U.S. general in Iraq - was doomed from the start. But they said that rising sectarian violence and the inability of Prime Minister Nouri al Maliki to unite the country changed the conditions. They say they now must establish security while training Iraqi forces because ultimately, "they are our ticket out of Iraq," as one senior Pentagon official put it.

Could some enterprising reporter ask the President about this? When will our Great Mesopotamian Adventure come to an end?

Thanks, But No Thanks

If no one else will take the "War Czar" job, maybe they should give John Connor a call. He could beat SkyNet, right?

Retired USMC General John Sheehan to Bush: Go find some other patsy upon whom to pin your failed war.

The day-to-day work of the White House implementation manager overseeing Iraq and Afghanistan would require a great deal of emotional and intellectual energy resolving critical resource issues in a bureaucracy that, to date, has not functioned well. Activities such as the current surge operations should fit into an overall strategic framework. There has to be linkage between short-term operations and strategic objectives that represent long-term U.S. and regional interests, such as assured access to energy resources and support for stable, Western-oriented countries. These interests will require a serious dialogue and partnership with countries that live in an increasingly dangerous neighborhood. We cannot "shorthand" this issue with concepts such as the "democratization of the region" or the constant refrain by a small but powerful group that we are going to "win," even as "victory" is not defined or is frequently redefined.

It would have been a great honor to serve this nation again. But after thoughtful discussions with people both in and outside of this administration, I concluded that the current Washington decision-making process lacks a linkage to a broader view of the region and how the parts fit together strategically. We got it right during the early days of Afghanistan -- and then lost focus. We have never gotten it right in Iraq. For these reasons, I asked not to be considered for this important White House position. These huge shortcomings are not going to be resolved by the assignment of an additional individual to the White House staff. They need to be addressed before an implementation manager is brought on board.

Translation: You, Mr. Bush, have shit the bed. There is no way to un-shit it. And I'll be goddamned if I roll around in your stank-ass sheets. Enjoy your cluster fuck, sir, for I will have no part of it.

Although the general is far more politic than I would be, I agree with what he says. Who wouldn't?

Data Trump Values*

These chowderheads could've come up with a better education plan. Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk.

We recently saw the release of yet another study showing that "abstinence-only" education is a waste of money (as well as a crock of shit).

Not that the current crop of chuckleheads who run the country will pay attention. But it's good to know if you care about public education in your community and nationwide.

Here's a PDF of the Mathematica report. Here's the NY Times article from today's paper. The print edition carried a longer piece, so you might consider picking one of those up this afternoon if you still can.

*A "senior Bush advisor" once remarked that "values trump data" where sex education is concerned. Seriously.

Presidentin' Is Still Hard Work

Now who kin run mah war fer me?

Check out the latest brainstorm from the Bush Administration--they're looking for a "war czar."

No, really. I am not making this up.

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - The White House wants to appoint a high-profile overseer to manage the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan but has had trouble finding someone to take the job, The Washington Post reported on Wednesday.

At least three retired four-star generals approached by the White House in recent weeks have turned down the position, the report said.

The war "czar" would report directly to President George W. Bush and national security adviser Stephen Hadley and would have authority to issue directions to the
Pentagon and the State Department, the newspaper said.

Retired Marine Gen. John "Jack" Sheehan, a former top NATO commander, was among those who rejected the job, the newspaper reported.

"The very fundamental issue is, they don't know where the hell they're going," Sheehan told the Post.

Sheehan said he believes that Vice President Dick Cheney and his hawkish allies remain more powerful within the administration than pragmatists looking for a way out of Iraq, the Post reported.

"So rather than go over there, develop an ulcer and eventually leave, I said, 'No, thanks,' " Sheehan told the paper.

Retired Army Gen. Jack Keane and retired Air Force Gen. Joseph Ralston were also approached and said they were not interested in the position, the newspaper said, citing sources.

Ralston declined to comment while Keane confirmed he turned down the job, the Post said.

The White House has not publicly disclosed its interest in creating the position, hoping to find someone to fill the post before the job is announced.

Officials said they were still considering options to reorganize the White House's management of the two wars, the Post said.

Uh, you know, there's already someone who's in charge of the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq. He has this oval-shaped office in a large white mansion in Washington, DC. You know, that "Decider" guy? Maybe you've heard of him.

Interesting how no one wants to be a part of Bush's train wreck, either. You'd think that you could find at least one sycophantic general ready to jump at the chance.

Hey, there might be someone for the job, after all. He's looking for work, I believe.

If I just sprinkle the pixie dust on the ground after I plant the magic beans, then Freedom™ will break out everywhere!

Finally, this looks like a good opportunity to use my absolute favorite photo ever of Rummy.

I swear, this photo has not been retouched.

If I Can't Have It My Way...

Fuck this jerk.

The fucking Bush administration is at it again. They're going to block an anti-terrorism bill.

Why, you ask? Not tough enough? Leaves glaring holes that are easily exploited? Doesn't include a Cheney-prostate-massage provision?

No, no, and, thank god, no.

The Bush people and the craziest of the Republicans in the Senate don't like this bill because--get this--it includes a provision that will let airport screeners unionize.

The horror.

WASHINGTON - President Bush and his Senate allies will kill a Sept. 11 antiterror bill if Congress sends it to the White House with a provision to let airport screeners unionize, the White House and 36 Republicans said Tuesday.

"As the legislation currently stands, the president's senior advisers would recommend that he veto the bill," said White House spokesman Scott Stanzel.

Senate Republicans swiftly backed up the threat with a pledge by more than enough senators to block any veto override attempt.

"If the final bill contains such a provision, forcing you to veto it, we pledge to sustain your veto," they wrote to the president. Sen. Jim DeMint, R-S.C., planned to offer an amendment to strip the provision from the bill.

Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff said that allowing screeners to unionize would impede the department's quick response to possible threats. Fast redeployment of screeners, such as in response to Hurricane Rita and the failed London plot to blow up airliners, cannot wait for negotiations, he said.

Chertoff said screeners are as much on the front lines in the war against terror as military troops.

"Marines don't collectively bargain over whether they're going to wind up, you know, being deployed in Anbar province or in Baghdad," Chertoff told reporters after a briefing with senators. "We can't negotiate over terms and conditions of work that goes to the heart of our ability to move rapidly in order to deal with the threats that are emerging."

Other federal employees have collective bargaining and whistle-blower protection rights.

Chertoff's reasoning, according to the American Federation of Government Employees, is "an insult to the hundreds of thousands of dedicated public safety officers with collective bargaining rights — from border patrol agents to firefighters to the Capitol Hill police," said John Gage, president of the federation.

So can someone please talk about how Bush and the Republicans are "playing politics with national security"?

Not that, you know, I expect the elite press to be aware that this is actually happening. Republicans strong, Republicans manly, protect us, big daddy.

Also, and you didn't need me to tell you this, Jim DeMint and Michael Chertoff are world-class turds.

Is Our President Learnin'?

Presidentin' sure is hard work. Learnin', too.

It looks like someone got a grammar lesson!

WASHINGTON
President Bush, on a collision course with Congress over Iraq, said Friday "I'm the decision-maker" about sending more troops to the war. He challenged skeptical lawmakers not to prematurely condemn his buildup.

Does that mean he's not gonna claim to be The Decider no more?

That's a shame.

Busy Day

So I think I'll just post what may be the most shameful image from the last six years.

Christ. What a douche. Or schmuck, if you prefer.

Our Idiot President

Click on this photo to enlarge it. Sure, it looks like a standard Bush family portrait, and you can say a lot about what a slap in the face this picture is to American ideals.

But check out the President's shoes.

That's right. He's got the Presidential seal on his goddamn boots.

Kee-rist. We've got two more years of dealing with this fake-ass cowboy. That's a long, long time.

Worth Ten Thousand Words

Caption contest! Come up with a good one for this photo:

My submission: "When's th' movie comin' out?"

I know you can do better than that. Leave 'em in the comments.

The Idiots Who Rule Us

Read this, asshole.

Forty years too late, George W. Bush finally made it to Vietnam. If you know anything about George W. Bush, you won't be surprised to find out that he started spewing idiotic blather as soon as someone shoved a microphone in front of his slack jaw.

In his first day in the capital of a country that was America’s wartime enemy during his youth, President Bush said today that the American experience in Vietnam contained lessons for the war in Iraq. Chief among them, he said, was that “we’ll succeed unless we quit.”

--snip--

“The Maliki government is going to make it unless the coalition leaves before they have a chance to make it,” he said of Iraq’s prime minister. “And that’s why I assured the prime minister we’ll get the job done.”

With emotional imagery to deal with on every side here, it is no surprise that Mr. Bush’s national security team has spent great effort drawing distinctions between the war that their generation grew up with, and the one that they ordered.

--snip--

“Historical parallels of that kind are not very helpful, and I don’t think they happen to be right,” Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice told reporters the other day. “This is a different set of circumstances, with different stakes for the United States.”

Stephen J. Hadley, the president’s national security adviser, struck a similar note last week when he suggested that the “domino effect” that Americans worried about in the 1960’s and 70’s — the fear that neighboring countries would fall to Communism’s lures — was nothing compared to the problems today.

“There were discussions about dominoes, some which fell, some which didn’t fall,” he said. But, he added, “Most men and women in America believe that it is important that we not fail in Iraq; that the consequences of an Iraq that descended into chaos would be an Iraq that would be a safe haven for terrorists.”

Ultimately, he said, that “could result in 9/11-type attacks against the United States.”

In private, Mr. Bush says there is another big difference between then and now — the draft. There is little question that by signing up to be a pilot in the Texas Air National Guard, the risk was low that he would end up in Vietnam as a 23-year-old. But according to an academic called into the White House recently, Mr. Bush said the administration could never have sustained this effort in Iraq, politically, without an all-volunteer force. He declined to be named because he was relaying a private conversation.

Just once, it would be nice not to have important foreign policy decisions left to morons like these.

If Barbara Tuchman were still alive, she'd be furiously writing another section of that book. Iraq is an exercise in pursuit of policy contrary to self-interest that makes Vietnam look like child's play.

This would be funny if it weren't for, you know, the dead and maimed.

UPDATE: Check out Keith Olbermann's lessons for Mr. Bush. Honestly, I had no idea that Keith Olbermann would turn into this generation's Edward R. Murrow. But here's the proof.

Conservatism Can Never Fail; It Can Only Be Failed

Kinda like that other big "C" word, Communism.

I'm really busy today, but you should go read Glenn Greenwald. Seriously. You should.

He's a sharp dude.

Also, to further support the title of this li'l post, check out what the true believers are wailing about at Der Frei Republik and RedState.

For your daily dose of schadenfreude, check out the comments below, taken from RedState and FreeRepublic:

RedStater Bob Frazier says:

This shows they have learned nothing.

The Republican leadership has clearly learned nothing from the election results Tuesday.

Could they have made a worse pick?

I tell you, for the next two years we are going to have to think of President Bush as a democrat and act accordingly. My hope is complete government gridlock for two years.

RedStater OldLineGOP says:

Gridlock doesn't happen when the executive and legislative branches are held by the same party. Look at what Bush wants, and what the Dems who will soon control Congress want. Well, they both agree on eliminating our national borders, which Bush has deemed to be his most important legacy, even more important than the failed war in Iraq. Conservative are angry because we got nothing accomplished when we controlled Congress and the Presidency. It's almost like we had...well..."gridlock." That's because Bush is practically a Democrat, and is at odds with most Republicans. I stand by my original belief that Bush is glad the GOP lost the election.

Freeper TulsaRamjet says:

This is a disaster....Okay, who do I start emailing to express my "displeasure"?...does actually someone think that this centrist is gonna gain the Hispanic vote? It won't. '08 disaster is guaranteed with this choice.

RedStater Mayhem:

This has little to do with the actualy influence of the RNC chair and plenty to do with the mindset behind the choice. It shows that Bush still thinks he's right; has learned nothing from the election (except that we should become MORE moderate); and that he will go to all lengths to ensure his view of amnesty is shoved down our throats.

This is Harriet Miers all over again, except this time Bush has absolute say.

Freeper ShawTaylor:

Apparently the Rep leadership has chosen to go for the so called "moderate middle"...?

IMHO conservatives need to consider forming a whole new political party.

Freeper Fritzy:

I am SO ready for a new party...
Do you know how to work Wikipedia? If so, we can get crackin' in a few hours.

RedStater Spainishirish:

No wonder Pelosi is so adamant against impeachment! Why destroy the gift that keeps on giving?

Finally, RedStater EZontheEyez:

I mean...if competance is not an issue for RNC Chair - who is charged with the political lives of Republicans in 2008 - then surely he is willing to play these games with a next Supreme Court nomination. Hello future justice Connie Callahan.

Good grief.

Let's impeach Dubya now, before this gets any worse. I'm almost willing to let him be dragged before a war crimes tribunal if it will get him out of the White House, pronto.

Looks like they're drinking deeply from the bitter cup of disappointment. But they're not disillusioned with Conservatism! Oh, no. Yet again, the One True Faith has been betrayed by dissembling mortals.

Fuck these idiots.

I'm glad they're turning on one another. Let 'em eat their young. It'll make for a good show for the rest of us.

When Pigs Fly

No, no, I mean the four-legged kind.

In today's best example of Wishful Thinking, a couple of highly intelligent writers at Newsweek (a Web exclusive! Ooooh!) have decided that "Bush now needs to work with the Democrats. Why humility might be his best strategy."

That's gonna happen.

'Cause if George W. Bush is known for anything, it's his humility. Yeah, he's got that in spades.

These two geniuses remind us that Bush once promised to bring a "humble foreign policy" to Washington.

He really followed up on that, didn't he? Oh, wait.

Humility in action.

Here's some in-your-face humility.

Fuck these idiot stenographers. Bush doesn't know from humble, and he's not about to learn now. He'll be the same obstinate bully he's been his entire life. To assume otherwise is pointless. But I bet they get a pretty good salary for this exercise in counterfactual thinking. If, indeed, you can even call it thought.

Everything About This Kicks Ass

Is It Just Me?

Or does it look like Honest Abe is taking a dump on Bush's head?

I guess he's expressing his disapproval with what Bush has done to the Party of Lincoln. I mean, he's partly (by which I mean mostly) responsible for this:

With congressional elections less than three weeks away, the Republican party's approval ratings are at an all-time low, with approval of the Republican-led Congress at its lowest point in 14 years, according to an NBC News/Wall Street Journal poll released on Wednesday.

--snip--

The poll numbers and President George W. Bush's own job approval ratings, which have been mired in the 30 percent range, are an ominous sign for a party trying to maintain control of Congress, NBC said.

Bush had a job approval rating of 38 percent, down 1 percentage point from a previous NBC News/Wall Street Journal poll released earlier this month after the Foley news first broke, NBC said.

Old Abe's probably still more than a little pissed about that "Mission Accomplished" stunt that Bushie pulled on the deck of the USS Abraham Lincoln.

So It's Come to This

He pities the President.

Why?

'Cause Bush is a fool.

Don't believe me? Check this out:

This morning my administration released the budget numbers for fiscal 2006. These budget numbers are not just estimates; these are the actual results for the fiscal year that ended February the 30th.

(Found at First Draft.)

That's right, my fellow Americans. Hang your heads in shame. There's so much wrong with that sentence, I don't know where to start.

Although I do have a wonderful idea for 2008.

T for President!

I think that's something we can all get behind.

Your President: Petty or Stupid?

If I can't have it, nobody can!

Why not both? Apparently, according to Sidney Blumenthal's new book, George Bush is both petty and stupid. I know this comes as a shock to no one, but check this out.

In "How Bush Rules: Chronicles of a Radical Regime," former Clinton aide Sidney Blumenthal recounts a November 2004 visit by Bush and his political guru Karl Rove to the William J. Clinton Library in Little Rock, Ark., on the banks of the Arkansas River.

"Bush appeared distracted and glanced repeatedly at his watch," Blumenthal writes about a presidential tour during the library's dedication. "When he stopped to gaze at the river, where Secret Service agents were stationed in boats, the guide said: 'Usually, you might see some bass fishermen out there.' Bush replied: 'A submarine could take this place out.'"

The author muses: "Was the President warning of an Al Qaeda submarine, sneaking undetected up the Mississippi, through the locks and dams of the Arkansas River, surfacing under the bridge to the 21st century to dispatch the Clinton Library? Is that where Osama Bin Laden is hiding? Or was this a wishful paranoid fantasy of ubiquitous terrorism destroying Clinton's legacy with one blow?"

And this guy is in charge of the US military? What kind of submarine could get all the way to the Little Rock riverfront, anyway? None that I know of, that's for sure. Maybe this guy could get it done:

Ha ha! Now I got you, Klin-ton!

Christ. Bush musing about terrorism, submarine capabilities, and revenge fantasies all at once. It's enough to make the blood run cold. Here's something that he needs to take a look at, but it might be a little over his head.

In other submarine-type news, the USS Dolphin only has a few more weeks as a commissioned vessel. If you don't know what the Dolphin is, then it's my duty and pleasure to tell you that she's the last diesel-electric submarine in the US Navy. She's had quite a career, and it's sad to see her go. But a 38-year career is pretty impressive.

Fair winds and following seas.

Note that she only draws 18 feet of water (surfaced), which gives her capabilities that the nuclear boats don't have in shallow water. A 688-class boat needs ten more feet of draft. The Seawolf and Virginia class boats need at least 28 feet (surfaced), I believe, if not more.

The DoD needs to get cracking on some new diesel-electric boats. But good luck finding the money.