Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Stupid Shit Tuesday

I found this while looking around at Dave Barry's blog (link to the right).

Ahh, Ohio. Thank you for diverting our attention away from Florida:
I respond to the photograph that accompanied the Tuesday Cox News Service article, "Whale shark breeding put under microscope," in the Dispatch Science pages. The photo showed a truck hauling a large crate containing two live sharks.

What might happen if such a shipment were to be involved in a highway accident and the crate broke open?

How many innocent motorists would be bitten in half as the freed beasts squirmed and flailed on the road until they suffocated or a state trooper came along and shot them to death?

To anyone at our own Columbus Zoo and Aquarium who might be tempted to be involved in such monkeyshines, please, ship your sharks by rail.
Uhh, so this is completely fuckin' stupid for a lot of reasons. How many innocent motorists are gonna get out of their cars and walk up to a goddamn shark on a highway?

Also, whale sharks? No teeth. Check it out. It eats plankton. Not peoples.

Thanks for the diversion, Matt Carmean.

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