Thursday, March 30, 2006

In Praise of His Noodly Appendage

In case you didn't know, I am a Pastafarian. That's right. I worship the Flying Spaghetti Monster. I have, in fact, been touched by His Noodly Appendage (I should add that I was an adult at the time, and the encounter was consensual). All praise to the Flying Spaghetti Monster, without whom we wouldn't even exist.

This last Monday, USA Today ran an article on Our Lord and His Prophet, Bobby Henderson. The article was, overall, fair. I do not feel persecuted in the least. Of course, the usual haters from the Discovery Institute (where, I believe, not a single discovery has been made) and other bastions of intolerance toward Pastafarianism have negative things to say, but such is to be expected. It takes a long time to show people the light.

However, there is one thing in particular that bears mention.

To wit, in the spirit of the founding of our church, I address the following open letter:

Dear Michael Ruse:

First, I'd like to thank you for your yeoman work in the past on the philosophy of science, particularly with respect to evolution. I've personally used several of your books, such as Darwinism Defended and The Evolution Wars, to good effect in various projects.

However, it seems to me that you need to put greater care into choosing your example when speaking with reporters. Please allow me to refresh your memory:
Florida State University science philosopher Michael Ruse, a critic of creationism, doubts that parodies change anyone's mind about evolution. "However, sometimes parodies outlast the originals," he adds, pointing to the classic Alice in Wonderland, in many ways a poke at math and logic.
Yes, I guess Alice in Wonderland has outlasted math--no one teaches that to children anymore.

It is possible, of course, that you were misrepresented by the reporter. If such is the case, I apologize. If not, however, I beg you to try the following.

Pray to the Flying Spaghetti Monster that the correct analogies and comparisons will come to you. If so petitioned, He will undoubtedly touch you with His Noodly Appendage, and the proper words will then flow like chunky marinara sauce from your heart, mind, and soul.

Thank you, Dr. Ruse,

Jude Toche, concerned citizen and Pastafarian.

That should do it.

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