Cowboy Up
So Bush likes to play cowboy, and think of himself as a tough-guy Westerner (though I can't ever imagine a pretzel kicking Yul Brynner's or Steve McQueen's ass). Well, let's think about today's craven slinking out of Baghdad, and see if we can Western it up a bit. I can see some Western movie parallels. The one that seems most appropriate is High Noon.
What's that, you say? High Noon? The 1952 Gary Cooper classic?
Yes. The same.
Doesn't seem to match up with what's going on in Iraq, you say?
Well, no. Not the Earth version of High Noon, anyway.
But, in keeping with this administration's previous actions, it's Bizarro World High Noon.
What would Gary Cooper (played by L. Paul Bremer) do in Bizarro World?
He'd be no tragic hero figure, that's for sure.
He would run Hadleyville like his own kingdom, for starters. He's let old friends come in and run the general store and the livery, and charge exorbitant prices for everything, and then not deliver the goods that customers paid for. He'd also, prior to Frank Miller's arrival, burn down the library and the local newspaper. Then he'd go rob the bank, and force the mayor to sign a document giving over half of the town's revenue to himself and his cronies (including his bosses Back East) in perpetuity. Then he'd beat the shit out of Grace Kelly, just for kicks. Finally, just before Frank Miller got to town, he'd set up some stooge as mayor, get on the train with his bags and bags of money, and leave town, shooting at livestock on the way out.
We at Punch and Jude would appreciate any further Bizarro World Western comparisons you, our dear readers, could offer. Please list them in the comments below.
So Bush likes to play cowboy, and think of himself as a tough-guy Westerner (though I can't ever imagine a pretzel kicking Yul Brynner's or Steve McQueen's ass). Well, let's think about today's craven slinking out of Baghdad, and see if we can Western it up a bit. I can see some Western movie parallels. The one that seems most appropriate is High Noon.
What's that, you say? High Noon? The 1952 Gary Cooper classic?
Yes. The same.
Doesn't seem to match up with what's going on in Iraq, you say?
Well, no. Not the Earth version of High Noon, anyway.
But, in keeping with this administration's previous actions, it's Bizarro World High Noon.
What would Gary Cooper (played by L. Paul Bremer) do in Bizarro World?
He'd be no tragic hero figure, that's for sure.
He would run Hadleyville like his own kingdom, for starters. He's let old friends come in and run the general store and the livery, and charge exorbitant prices for everything, and then not deliver the goods that customers paid for. He'd also, prior to Frank Miller's arrival, burn down the library and the local newspaper. Then he'd go rob the bank, and force the mayor to sign a document giving over half of the town's revenue to himself and his cronies (including his bosses Back East) in perpetuity. Then he'd beat the shit out of Grace Kelly, just for kicks. Finally, just before Frank Miller got to town, he'd set up some stooge as mayor, get on the train with his bags and bags of money, and leave town, shooting at livestock on the way out.
We at Punch and Jude would appreciate any further Bizarro World Western comparisons you, our dear readers, could offer. Please list them in the comments below.
posted by Jude at 11:22 AM
