Mickey Hate You

Hey kids! Mickey says fuck off!

Yes, Mickey hate you.

When James Worley paid a visit to Disney World in Florida his portly frame and white beard soon had kids asking: "Are you Santa Claus?"

Not wanting to disappoint, Mr Worley, 60, played along with some "ho-ho-hos".

But Disney officials descended, telling him to stop the impersonation or get out of the park. They said they wanted to preserve the magic of Santa.

Mr Worley took off his red hat and red shirt but said: "I look this way 24/7, 365 days a year. This is me."

Even after bowing to the request to alter his appearance, Mr Worley, from Tampa, said children continued to ask if he was Santa.

"How do you tell a little kid, 'No, go away, little kid'," Mr Worley told local television.

He said Disney had told him "Santa was considered a Disney character".

Fuck Disney, and fuck Mickey too. I hate Santa Claus bullshit, but this is ridiculous. Disney owns Santa Claus? Since fucking when?

I shouldn't be surprised that they'd say such a thing, though. Their whole scheme for years has been to appropriate public-domain figures as their own, prevent anyone else from using them, and then make a shitload of money off of, say, Grimm's fairy tale characters.

Fuck Disney. I hope Mickey carries the plague.